Sunday, November 21, 2010

Pregnancy Math Must Have Been Invented By a Man

40 Weeks...
and
3 Days...

Where did this whole "pregnant for nine months" come from?  Everyone always refers to nine months when talking about the length of a pregnancy.  There is even a movie starring Hugh Grant called Nine Months.  I don't know how math works in Hollywood, but if you take 40 weeks and divide by 4 weeks per month, I get 10 months.  How about you?  And even if you take the 2 weeks of pregnancy where you aren't really pregnant, that is still 38 weeks.  My math still gives me 9 and a HALF months.  Just ask any woman who has gone past 36 weeks, believe me, Weeks 37 and 38 definitely deserved to be mentioned! AND considering that a lot of women go all the way to 42 weeks, that is TEN AND A HALF MONTHS.  Even if you take off the 2 weeks at the beginning, we are back to 40 weeks- still 10 months.  Where did nine months come from???

And lets go back to the 2 weeks of pregnancy/but not pregnant.  If the doctors aren't counting those 2 weeks, then why are we still counting them?  Think of that poor high school girl who gets knocked-up the first time she has sex.  For the first two weeks of her pregnancy, she was a virgin???  Does this make sense to you? 

Like I said, it must have been a man who came up with all of this pregnancy math.

Now that I have ranted, let me say that I am so incredibly thankful for a full-term, healthy pregnancy.  As long as Jacob is healthy and continuing to thrive, he is welcome to stay a few more days.  But, it just seems like a cruel joke that for most of your life, you hear that a woman is pregnant for 9 months.  And even when you realize that it really is 40 weeks, when you hit that nine month mark you feel like you should be finished.  But you still have a month to go.  And then when you go past 40 weeks you start to go a little crazy (see ranting above...).  All of the over analyzing of every little stomach twitch and gas bubble that you feel, wondering if THIS is the start of labor. It is mentally exhausting!  Add this to the lack of sleep and hormone overload....let's just say that is a volatile cocktail.  Ooooh, a cocktail....

Yeah.  Take all of the above, and subtract the ability to sip on a nice cocktail to calm your nerves, for the past nine (TEN!) months...

Today, Matthew, Mom, and I headed to a local park that is located on a hill overlooking the city.  There are lots of hills and stairs winding in and out of the landscaping.  That and eating spicy food has amounted to a whole lot of nothing- except for sore legs and heartburn.  I have a midwife appointment tomorrow morning at 8:30, so we will shall see!  I really want this to happen naturally and without having to be induced, so everyone think nice, cervix-thinning thoughts, please. I know, I know, TMI.  Blame it on the crazy pregnancy hormones.  It affects my censoring abilities. 


9 comments:

Unknown said...

Kim, my Mum always found that Italian Pasta (and sauce) used to induce her - you might want to try that?

All the best

Keith

P.S. I'm the oldest of 7 - I think my mum and dad sort of knew what they were doing?

Robin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amber said...

Kim, I am right there with you, and sending lots of cervix thinning thoughts your way. If you have a couple of spare ones of your own, please send some back towards me! My doctor keeps talking about how pregnancy is actually 41 weeks, not including those first two weeks. I think every country has their own counting system. i've got French, British and American baby books and each starts from some place different.
My midwife told me the best way to make the cervix stuff happen is to "give your hubby a big cuddle", so if you haven't tried that yet, it might be time to hunker down and give it a go.

As for cocktails (or the lack of) I awarded myself a sip of wine today but didn't dare tempt the gods by having even half a glass -- heaven forbid I do, and then my water breaks, and then my baby is born drunk. What a way to start a life, right?

Here's to hoping the next time you post you've got a picture to share with all of us of the little guy! And i'm selfishly hoping that i'm in line right behind you!!

Sarah said...

I used homoeopathy for both my boys. It doesn't work, right? So I thought it wouldn't matter if I took it and you never know.

With my eldest, my waters broke at 11pm-ish, got to the hospital after my husband had taken a bath (I know...) and there, they all expected it to take a nice long time, first baby an' all, so they put me in a bedroom upstairs.

At 6.10am I phoned to say it was getting painful. Someone turned up an hour or so later, took me down to the birthing zone. At 7.40am a midwife strolls in to take a look and goes "OMG I can see the head!"

I asked about an epidural, she said 'no time, baby'll be here in 30 mins' and he was, 8.10am.

With number two I nearly gave birth in the car. Had to divert from the clinic in town to the maternity at the CHU nearby, got there at 8.50am, baby born at 9.05am! I was just getting my feet in the stirrups.

Quite an adventure! Good luck with yours :)

Jen said...

Love this blog!! LOL! And you are so right.. and if pregnancy includes the two weeks before conception.. then all of us are pregnant at least 24 weeks out of the year without even really being with child! Craziness! Btw, I remember reading on babycenter.com during my pregnancies that eggplant parmesan can get things going.. and, then, after wards a great "big hug" from your hubs. :)

PigletinFrance said...

I hope I'm arriving late and that all the cervix thinning vibes, homeotherapy, hugs, pasta and eggplant parmesan not to mention the walking and spicy food have worked! If not I will send you some more vibes!

The week counting thing drives me nuts, I'm only near the beginning (or getting to the half way mark I had hoped) but already it drives me mad! I don't have a clue when I will actually be due although they say end April. I say end of April fine, but not May 1st LOL!

I am gagging for a cocktail or a glass of wine, I actually feel like a drunk as I have never craved alcohol this much in my life - it's actually quite scary!

Good luck and fingers crossed

Unknown said...

Hope things are moving right along for you! I have been told a nice glass of wine at this point is not only fine but recommended! Thinning thoughts are over the pond to you!

John Bolton said...

Well in defense of all men....

40 weeks times 7 days is 280 days. If a month is 30.5 days then 40 weeks equals 9.18 months. QED

It is just math..... but I still love you.
Dad

Anonymous said...

Hi, know this thread is super old, but I found it and thought others might want to know the math.


"I thought I would drop a little knowledge on you all that I have been learning along the way of becoming a parent.

For those of you not familiar with this, the "due date" of a baby is determined by the start date of the woman's last mentrual cycle (LMP). However, conception obviously happens after that and every woman is different when it comes to when they can actually get pregnant (ovulation + fertilization).

The actual "gestation" period for a baby is 38 weeks +/- 2 weeks(every baby is different and they will come when they want to) from conception, not the conventional wisdom of 40 weeks or "9 months". The reason why people say 40 weeks instead of 38 weeks is because the assumption is that conception was roughly 2 weeks after the begining of LMP.

Also, you might think that 40 weeks is 10 months (4weeks per month), however, since most months have more than 4 weeks (28 days), 40 weeks equates to roughly 9 calendar months."