Total. Hormonal. Breakdown

On a day-to-day basis, my horrible French isn't really a problem.  It can be frustrating or embarrassing at times, but it isn't the end of the world.  I will say that since I have been pregnant, my French has gotten worse. Mostly because not having French classes and 'pregnancy brain', is a very bad combination when trying to learn a language!

Yesterday afternoon I headed out to the medical lab by our house. Each month during this pregnancy, I have to go to this lab for urine and blood tests.  Today I took with me an extra prescription from the anesthesiologist.  During our appointment with her back in September, she told me I would have to get this test to see if I had an infection, because if so, I wouldn't be able to get an epidural.  So, just like for the last 8 months, I went into the lab with my prescription and my little vial of urine (lovely, I know).  I was prepared for all the of the normal questions I have struggled with for the last 8 visits.  This time however, the girl starts trying to tell me/ask me something.  And no matter how many times she repeated it, I could. not. understand. her.

Then the pregnancy hormones kicked in.  I could feel myself start tearing up.  By this point, she had completely given up trying to get me to understand, so she just told me to have a seat in the waiting room.  I tried to calm myself down, hoping that whatever she tried to tell me wasn't that important.

A few minutes later, a young guy comes and leads me to a back room to draw my blood.  He starts to tell me something, and I pick up on some of the same words that the receptionist was saying to me.  And I still can't understand what he is saying!  So, here come the tears again.  I am trying so hard not to cry, and I am frustrated and embarrassed, so I start sweating.  It was horrible, I know I looked like a mess.  I am telling myself over and over again that it is just the hormones, "Pull it together, Kim.  You are fine.  This is not THAT big of a deal."  etc, etc.  Doesn't work.  He finishes drawing blood and takes me next door to another room with a table that has stirrups.  Up to this point, I have only had blood drawn, or the one visit where I did the glucose test for gestational diabetes.  Nothing that involved a table and stirrups!  Then he says something else (that, yet again, I didn't understand) and leaves. 

At this point I am a complete wreck.  So I call Matthew.  Luckily, he answered the phone and when the guy came back I just handed him the phone.  And, of course, as soon as he starts explaining the situation to Matthew on the phone, suddenly I can understand what he (and the receptionist) has been trying to tell me.  Basically, part of the prescription was for a vaginal exam to test for Group B strep.  He was the only one that was there at that moment to give the exam, but if I wanted to come back tomorrow, there would be a female nurse that could administer the exam.  At that point, even though now I understood what was going on, I was so embarrassed by the not understanding, and the crying, and the sweating... I just wanted to be finished.  And I definitely did not want to come back tomorrow and go through all this again!  The guy was so nice to me, even though I am sure he didn't know what to do with this blubbering, sweating, almost 39 week pregnant woman!  With the exam finished, I couldn't get out of there fast enough!

I wrote most of this blog yesterday, but waited to post it because I was having a total pity party for myself.  I was feeling so alone and far away from family and friends.  But, today is a new day.  The experience yesterday does make me SO incredibly thankful that this baby didn't decide to come early while Matthew was in China.  If I couldn't even get through a 30 minute ordeal at the lab, I don't think I would have survived a who-knows-how-long labor and delivery at the hospital by myself.  Speaking of being thankful, I have been blessed with a normal, healthy pregnancy.  And, although far from family and US friends, I am surrounded by a wonderful group of friends here, who are constantly offering to help with whatever I need.  And, my mom arrives on Sunday!  Hopefully, Jacob decides to hang out until his 'Maudy' gets here.   I am also extremely thankful for a wonderful husband, who gives me back rubs every night, and who (even though he laughs at me) puts on my socks and shoes for me because it is really hard to reach my feet!  Matthew and I are trying to enjoy every last minute we have that is just the two of us.  We have had lunch dates and dinner dates, and lots of lazy, cuddle time on the couch.  Although, I have to say, I am really looking forward to cuddle time with both my boys.  Soon, very soon...